GovX members tend to be funny people. Dark and offensive humor is your territory, and we’re here for it. Check out some of the funniest GovX member product reviews of the year.
Don’t forget to review your gear orders. Make it a funny one, because honestly, isn’t that what the internet is for?
“My husband has been tear gassed and pepper sprayed before, but he’s never been tased. So I tased him. It works.”
“This belt is tough enough to pull a tank out of the mud. But the best part is, if you’re in a hurry to get your pants down … one click, and they’re off.“
“The shirt label reads ‘100% Heavy Cotton’ which is exactly right as it was heavier than my ex-wife after she developed a McDonalds Frappe addiction.”
“This is an animal hair magnet. My dog, cat, horse and I are now the same person. I’d give it five stars except that I’ve been hacking up hairballs, the vet wants to give me a distemper shot, and the farrier has been eyeballing my feet.”
“My buddy’s wife loved it.”
“Keeps the boys in place in all situations.”
“Quality shirt. Has holes in the all the right places for the things that stick out, like head, arms, torso, etc.”
“Get this, and keep it a secret. Every guy needs this just because. Don’t let your wife know.”
“They look great and perform great, but for God and country, swap out the insoles.”
“These glasses f***.”
“Useful for MMA, kickboxing, or Jiu-Jitsu therapy to keep anger and hostility in check.”
“As an EDC for anything from opening boxes to stabbing someone, this knife is perfect in every way.”
“A baklava and this blend go hand in hand together.”
“It’s very easy to read at 2am when you awaken in your hammock to a weird noise in the trees.”
“She smiles and says thank you every time she wears it, and we’ve been married for a decade, so that means she legit likes it, otherwise it’d be stuffed in a corner of the closet with all the other failures.”
“Very comfy for old guys with no butt.”
“Has a unique way of letting folks know my inner thoughts.”
